Demian

This was the shortest book that I read over my break and was easy to flip though in a day. Although the book is pretty heavy on the symbolism and metaphorical aspects, it was actually quite similar to the book My Name is Asher Lev, in terms of theme. Both main characters feel a divide within themselves that they break down as "good" and "evil" and both have to do to their ties with their religion. However, Demian is definitely more psychological than Asher Lev. Sinclair's battle is wholly in his own mind, while Asher battles himself, his family and community, and his artistic ability to find himself. Sinclair's journey is less about discovering his own identity, but more of his human nature and how religious morals can affect the mind. 

There were many things about Sinclair's character that I found frustrating, such as his static nature, his constant need for mentorship, and his constant desire for things that were beyond his reach. At first I found his conflict to be a pretty general character struggle and actually quite relatable, but the nature of his character did not change throughout the entire book. Sinclair learned things, but the things he learned only furthered his want for knowledge, which also prolongs throughout the entirety of the novel. The book poses Sinclair's search for knowledge as something that could be seen as an "evil" desire-- perhaps to tie into the Biblical story of Adam and Eve and how their desire for the fruit of knowledge led to their downfall. The more Sinclair learns, the more it draws him toward a figure named Abraxas, a god that is said to have both pure and satanic elements. Maybe I am supposed to feel more anxious as Sinclair falls deeper into his "dark side" and his fall from his "light" side, but I felt nothing towards Sinclair and honestly stopped caring which side he ended up as and wanted to know what would happen to him. 

What did end up happening to him, I felt was both obvious and not at the same time. A lot of this story is not handed to the reader on a silver platter, with its plethora of religious allegory, psychological themes, and symbolism. Demian and Eva Frau seem both human and mystical beings at the same time, which I am sure Herman Hesse did intentionally, and serves to make the reader think about what is actually happening to Sinclair. Therefore, I am also not sure if the ending is supposed to be "good" or "bad" or if there is a clear answer for it. Because it does seem that Sinclair has also broken free of the restraints he felt on himself and has reached a higher plane of knowledge, making Demian's place in his life unnecessary, which is why he leaves in the end of the book. On one hand, Sinclair has achieved a state where he has come to terms with both his light and dark sides, transcending him. On the other hand, he is now alone, some plane on his own with no new mentor to go to, and unable to return to his "light" place. It is confusing and I think the book has left me with more questions than it has anything else. I wouldn't say it's a bad read, but definitely something I need to sit on for longer and think about.